The hair and Chris finally lets the cat out

To answer Kelly's question, about a month or so ago, my hair was causing me great concern. The piecey-ness had grown out to a Carol Brady, not so attractive, bi layered mess. I had just decided to hire the housekeeper so $ was on my mind. I took a pair of scissors to the office and asked my mom or my sis to hack it off. My sis took on the challenge and it is no longer causing me grief. It's gonna stay short for the summer at least!
We got a new car last week to accomodate the growing group of children in this place. 7 seats! Yeah! I can fill those seats with my eyes closed and the help our our adoption agency.
Last night at the reception Chris was showing his sister and her bf the new car. When I was dancing with one of Chris' step sisters, he FINALLY told his sis that we are expecting. He hadn't told anyone yet. That is so difficult when all my fam knows but his doesn't.
I told Chris last week that I was starting to show. He so did not believe me. HA!
I asked him why he ended up telling her last night. He said, "Um, while you were dancing with Tracy looking all pregnant, I had to say something!" I said, " I TOLD YOU I was showing!!" He got a big smile on his face and said, "Yeah, you really are." HA!
I guess that he said to them, "So, I guess you know why we need a bigger car." His sister started laughing and said, "As soon as you two walked in, I wanted to say, ' How far along are you guys?' Then my bf said something, but we just decided to keep our mouths shut until one of you said something."
I knew I was showing.

Still fits!

13 weeks pregnant
You are looking at my favorite pre pregnancy purchase, my main dress for the summer. I wore it last month in our home town to a wedding reception. The above pics are from tonight where we had to go to a neighboring town for a wedding reception. Next month we have another wedding reception in another town and I'm hoping to wear it then too. It will be interesting to see if I can still zip the zipper and breathe. Yeah, breathing would be a bonus.

We were staring into a 90 + degree sun in these photos. Regardless, I'm so missing my Botox. Did you know that you can't do Botox while you are pregnant? Ah, the sacrifices I make for these kids. So not only do I feel older than the hills, my skin around my eyes looks it!

PS. We had fun at the reception and I did not expect to. Love that!

Boy or Girl?

What do you think it is?

This pregnancy has brought forth such passionate opinions that I'm surprised. And, the funny thing is that I have no clue. When I was pregs with Ivy, I KNEW she was a girl from the get go. This one, I have absolutely no feeling either way.

I have a girlfriend who is very intuitive and she came up to me yesterday and said, "This one is a girl". I have a tendency to think that she will be the one that is correct, but you know how that goes! Most everyone else (sister, sis in law, cousin, therapist) feels like it is a boy.

I had a dream last night that we had a girl. We were in the delivery room and for some reason in my dream we hadn't found out the sex yet. When they pulled her out of me, they said, "It's a girl!" and we were all happy.

We are finding out when we get the chance. I'm a need to know kind of gal as you all are well aware!

So, what is your vote?

All's Well!

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Waving Hello

Little one looks great! Kept doing backspins and being a wiggle worm the whole time. Seems it will fit in with brother and sister just fine with all of the activity going on in there.

Hopefully next u/s we will get to see what we are having!

Sooner than later

Well, suprisingly, I think that I may have been looking forward to having another tiny newborn.
I was looking thru an old Oprah magazine today and a small photo in a photo collage caught my eye. It was a pic from the early 80s or late 70s of a mama in a hospital bed, holding her newborn son.
Something about the image stopped me. I turned back and looked at it and thought, "Awwww." And then, slowly, a thought came to me. I might be in a situation like that at the end of this year. That could be a photo representation of me. Wow. Maybe I am processing this a bit better than I thought.
Recently, when I see a newborn in person, I automatically turn my head. I can't even look. My friend's son is still an infant. I coo over him. I love him. I buy things for him. But I don't touch him. If I have to hold him, I hand him back quickly. It is too much, too soon. He reminds me of what all of this pregnancy stuff is all about. It's a lot to feel. Especially with his sweet smell and his tiny perfectness.
When he had troubles with seizures a couple of weeks after his birth, I was terrified. I kept thinking, but he's perfect. He's here. And then, my shadow side said, "Babies die everyday Karianne. You know this. He is not safe." And all of my fears were back.
I detached so completely when I was pregs with Ivy. The concept of losing her was too huge, so I unconsciously decided to not engage the whole time. Everything was last minute. My bag was packed while I was in labor. The crib set up the week before, not a bit sooner. Absolutely no pregnancy articles, shows, magazine, books or images. And, when it was all said and done, I never thought that she would be born alive. Or if she was, that she would die before I brought her home. I never made that pregnancy=baby connection. I had up too many safeguards to keep myself from not going insane.
This time, I still have my arms crossed. Not open yet. But, that small little photo was a little prod for me to consider a different outcome. Astoundingly, I may be that woman. I've walked the walk for 12 weeks.
Now, lets just see how Wednesday's u/s goes.
And my infection is much better. Yeah!
I'm taping that pic to my desk. Positive reminders are good.

Misery, Party of One

OK gals, I'm sick. Sinus infection, antibiotic sick. Raspy, croaky sick. Face pain, throat pain, neck pain, ear pain sick. Fever with chills sick. Can barely turn my head sick.
My midwife called in an antibiotic for me to pick up tomorrow. I so hope that it works. Besides having allergies to about every scent, did you know that I am allergic to penicillin, erythromyacin and sulfa antibiotics? Holy.
But all of this pales in comparison to my worries about what this is all doing to the fetus. So many meds. No food. Poor little thing.
I think that I'm about to put myself on bedrest! Of course Ivy has swim lessons and tennis lessons this week. Of course. I'm off to the tub.

Dr. Update

Went in to see the midwife about this cold and although there is a lot of congestion, there isn't any infection yet. Yeah!
So, we are going to try to get out of this without antibiotics. Which at this point means, rest, fluids, tylenol sinus and hot packs to my face.
I had no idea how effective over the counter meds can be. The tylenol has made me feel somewhat better.